What Is Self-Settling?

Self-setting, self-soothing (or self-sleeping, as I prefer to call it) is what we refer to as a baby’s ability to go from being wide awake to fast asleep all by themselves, without any help from mum or dad. It may seem like a simple task (well, for some of us anyway) but babies don’t quite know how the world, or their bodies work. They’ve just come out of a safe, dark, warm place into a scary new environment. They will need help falling asleep in the early days, but as they grow, they will learn to put themselves to sleep.

When do babies learn to self-settle?

Generally, babies will begin to self-settle (self-sleep) at around the 4-5-month mark, however, all little ones are different. They grow at different rates and they develop at different rates. Self-sleeping doesn’t have to be part of your baby’s sleep routine until you’re comfortable with the idea of it. Eventually, you will need to take steps to help them settle themselves into a good night’s sleep, but while they’re still newborns it’s definitely ok to help them get to sleep. To be honest, the more your baby self-settles, the easier it may be for them to overcome separation anxiety and other distressing emotions, so there are benefits to jumping on the self-settle train.

How can I tell if my baby is self-settling?

If you find that your baby is falling asleep easier without you in the room, they’re likely learning to self-settle. Maybe they have a lovey to help them through the process, so they don’t feel completely alone. Either way, when your baby starts to self-sleep, you’ll know it. You might find that you become less anxious about bedtime too.

As always, sleep sweetly and deeply my dears and don’t be afraid to reach out for help xx

Find out when to stop swaddling!

Header 📸 @zaveandisla